Mama in the City

A blog about raising my family in downtown Vancouver

Lessons I Didn't Know I'd Learn

This month there is a very special event I am planning and details are being polished up as I type this. Benjamin will be celebrating his first birthday on September 8th and I am enjoying all aspects of planning his birthday party. Nothing elaborate or over the top but I do love to plan and throw a party! In fact I have always loved to host parties so this is a great chance to do just that and celebrate my boy Ben! I love that boy!

I think that being the mother of a high needs baby somehow celebrating this first birthday is extra special. All of those hard, trying and exhausting moments will have all been worth it. Over the last year there were many times where I felt helpless and wasn't sure if I could be a parent to a high needs baby like Ben. Now a year of parenting is under my belt and I feel somewhat more competent in dealing with babies that seriously require 24/7 parenting. Seriously 24/7 and I give major kudos to any single parent of a baby that is particularly high needs.

Now a year later I really know how to entertain and meet the demands of a 'high needs' baby. Of course it is still exhausting because these babies still have the same temperament so sometimes I still pull out my hair out in exasperation and do some loud sighing. The difference that a year makes is that I am not floundering around thinking that I must be doing something wrong. I have learned that temperament plays a huge role and I have not done anything wrong or missed some important parenting trick or didn't read some special book.

One of my girlfriends recently told me the first birthday party is really a celebration that you, as a parent, 'made it' and survived the first year. Of course this girlfriend is a mother to a girl who was also a high needs baby like Ben and she gets me. Now her baby is a sweet amazing four year old that says unprovoked stuff like, 'thank you for meeting with us today Auntie Andrea'. Too cute. So, as the baby days dwindle what better way to kick off the next year than with some cake and of course a little bubbly. It is a celebration after all and I plan to do just that.

Here are a few fun unrelated pictures from a walk we took in our neighbourhood.


Jamie said...

I am so glad to hear that! My daughter is high needs / high energy as well :)

September 5, 2009 at 5:10 PM  
Michelle said...

I hope it was a lovely celebration for you all, and a chance to reflect on how much your little "high needs" man has taught you over this last year as I did!! I "get you" sister :)

My high needs girl, who had my undivided attention today through a play-a-thon of craft time, dolls, dress up and take-out sushi said "thank you momma, because this is my best day ever in my whole life and I want it again and again". Ben will have the words soon, and you'll know that every sleepless night and endless day was worth it.

Enjoy momma!! YOU MADE IT!

September 11, 2009 at 9:19 PM  

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