Mama in the City

In the wee hours of the night, as my sweet baby Ben lay sleeping and the city came to a quiet lull, I would take the moment to peruse various blogs and see what other people had to say. Sometimes I would just last a moment and look at the topics that were discussed and sometimes I became a blog addict and would look for updates! pictures! give me more!

Usually the blogs I would chose to follow were about motherhood, babies, pregnancy and recently they were about a mama in the US who was pregnant with a baby that was considered 'incompatible with life'. At her routine 20 week ultrasound the baby was diagnosed with a trisomy and anencephaly. This baby may take a breath at birth but was not expected to live and most likely die during labor. This story got to me on a few levels. As a new mama and as a labor and delivery RN.

Of course I imagined myself in this situation. The 'what if's' as a mother to be and of course as the potential RN who was at the delivery of any of these babies. I would let myself think about how I would choose to handle the situation. How would I cope? Would I have strength? What could I give to the family if I was these labor nurse?

I would sit on the couch lounging with my lap top and read what this specific young mother had to say. She was nearing term in her pregnancy and ultimately knowing that her sweet baby girl was being born but there was no 'hello' just 'goodbye'.

My husband would look over at me and question what I was doing. A few little tears prickling in my eyes and I would just pretend I was fine! 'Just looking at my facebook page'. However, in reality I was becoming invested in an on line blog and it was pulling at me. I allowed myself to think about this situation on many levels and questioned myself about how I would handle this situation. What would you do if you were pregnant only to know your baby would die? You would still feel all the kicks and wiggles, all the strains and amazing moments of pregnancy only to know that at anytime your baby will die. These was no happy ending. Just sadness.

Nightly I would check up on little baby 'April Rose'. She was still alive! She was moving! Then the mother was in labor and having a home birth! The baby was born breathing! Now this sweet baby had been alive for over 19 hours! Hundreds, if not thousands, of people were following this story as it unfolded and then it vanished.

The crap part. It is believed to be F-A-K-E. Fake! All those woman bloggers out there started to question details and facts and all of a sudden the blog was shut down. I talked about it with my husband...could this be fake? How do we know? Are we jumping the gun here?

I followed a few blogs that talked about little April Rose and it seems that the conclusion is just this. Little baby April Rose, who was loved and followed by many, is a scam. There is no baby April born at home to a young mother who was waiting for the first and last breath of her newborn. I am trying to wrap my mind around this. Who is this person who invests their time and energy into making up a long long story about being pregnant with a trisomy baby. Retaining the support and wisdom of mothers who have actually travelled this path.

It leads me to think about the anonymous world wide web. How easy is it to pretend to be someone else. To gain attention and support. Of course many people have thoughts on why someone would falsify a sad story about being pregnant with a baby who is expected to die. Money? Attention? Whatever the case it is sad. There is no happy conclusion or end to the April Rose story and it leaves a sour taste in my mouth.