Mama in the City

A blog about raising my family in downtown Vancouver

The Makings Of A Love Letter

Once upon a time I used to get a lot of love letters from my husband. Pages of hand written messages that are currently filed away and nestled in a box. Perfectly picked out cards with sweet and tender notes inscribed. That was all before we were married for numerous years, before we had two small children and before we used technology to keep in touch on a minute by minute basis.

Todays love letters are looking a little bit different and the themes have changed. We used to gush about spending the rest of our lives together, making tiny babies together and being with each other 24/7. We have done all of that, but we can still make each others heart palpitate appropriately? I think so.

Photo credit here

Yesterday I was feeling a bit overwhelmed with everything that accumulates day to day. Children needed to be taken places in the morning, the house was accumulating mess at a very rapid speed and I was just not feeling it at all. So, while waiting for Ben's gym class to wrap up and wrangling a busy baby who wants to move move move, I shot a text message off to my husband.

It went like this:

ME: Oh my god. I'm in such a bad mood! Seriously. The house is a mess and I just want to be able to focus on the babies and not worry about the sparkle of the toilet.

(5 seconds later)

ME: I'm feeling so short tempered and have decided that the house mess is the root cause of it. I want a house cleaner so that I can just focus on being a nice mum!

(2 minutes later)

HIM: Ok. Today @ 3 PM. Can you be out of the house? Cleaning service is coming. Just booked.

And there you have it! That made my heart swoon and my face smile more so than any love letter from our early dating days. The dude really gets me, he knows what makes me happy.

Today I woke up and the apartment was clean and tidy and I knew that I could just focus on being a nice mum without having to plan out what I needed to clean. I couldn't have been a happier person. True love I tell you, it is true love.


Ashley S said...

True love is meeting the needs of your partner. Whether those needs are hugs & kisses, love letters, dinner on the table or getting the house clean it's about going outside yourself to do something to make life better, happier, easier for the one you love. That is love.

June 28, 2012 at 11:26 AM  

I couldn't agree with you more Ashley. I think it is important to know what makes your partner feel loved...for me (right now) it is clean counters and sparkling toilets. 8 years ago it was totally different. I'm sure in a few more years it might be something else too!

June 28, 2012 at 12:07 PM  
Janice Gelman said...

Like X 100! You had someone clean your house AND your husband set that up? Like! Like! Like!

June 28, 2012 at 2:23 PM  
Mrs Loquacious said...

Sweet! Who'd you use? We may be in the market for new housekeepers; ours are sort of flaky (though the price is right).

June 28, 2012 at 5:40 PM  

Well, this time around it was a one off and my husband booked Merry Maids. Expensive for sure but great that they could come on such short notice. Plus two people came. I am totally going to be booking someone though. Got a great tip from a neighbour about an independent housecleaner that she uses.

June 28, 2012 at 7:33 PM  
Deathstar said...

I remember when my son was just a baby and I had a woman come over to clean and my husband phoned and said I had never sounded happier. Cause for once, I could just enjoy being with my baby and not worry about how dirty the kitchen, bathroom was. It was heaven. Sigh. Living off the vapours of that memory.

June 29, 2012 at 8:56 AM  

I am swooning after that. What a totally sweet and loving thing your hubby did. I am going back to work full time in September after working part time for 5 years and I keep telling my hubby, we are so getting a house cleaner.

June 29, 2012 at 9:33 PM  
Erin said...

That is so brilliant. We had a cleaner in London, and it was heaven. I'm going to hit you up for the name of the independent cleaner person you've had recommended...

July 1, 2012 at 9:30 PM  
Sarah M said...

Wow! Now that is the RIGHT response from a husband!! You are extremely fortunate that Alex is so caring. I wish I could get that sort of response. The one I would get would be insensitive and would probably go like this: "The house is a mess and you are feeling overwhelmed? Don't spend so much time on the computer and maybe it would be tidier."

Ya somewhere in there I love him for some reason or another! I think that I deserve a house cleaner to come clean the old house so we can focus on moving into the new house right? Enjoy your future housecleaner!!

July 2, 2012 at 7:58 PM  

I totally get you Sarah. The house cleaner thing was a huge hot topic in our home. When I was pregnant, and it was a hard pregnancy, and working I really really wanted someone else to do some of the cleaning. Alex totally disagreed with me on that one. I think he has finally come to his senses and now sees what a nice wife I can be when the bathroom is perfectly cleaned ;)

And..yes..I totally think that you do deserve a housecleaner too. IN fact, all new mothers should. In some ways, I would have rather people had gotten together and chipped in for a house cleaning service rather than actual individual presents.

July 2, 2012 at 9:17 PM  
kristin said...

hmmm...where did my comment go?

i feel like i just read part of a romance novel. sweep me off my feet with comments like, "the cleaning service is coming!" ah. a love letter indeed.

sometimes text messaging is just what we need to maintain the slightest bit of communication between partners who are pulled in many more directions as a result of parenthood.

July 3, 2012 at 9:01 AM  
agracefuldisaster blog said...

Okay wow, MY heart just swooned. What a great husband.

I send text messages of despair to my husband often when mothering is just feeling so difficult and defeating, and just the little notes back from him often help pick me up. Yesterday when I was being dramatic over the fact that it was just too hot (100 degrees!) to go do something outdoors and I was feeling cooped up and frustrated with my toddler, he wrote back, "Why don't you go to Target? Get a Diet Coke and popcorn, and wander around, maybe pick out a fun sprinkler for the back yard."

Like seriously. OKAY, maybe I will!

He just gets my out of my funk sometimes. So nice to have a life partner that gets you.

July 3, 2012 at 1:56 PM  
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August 8, 2012 at 8:19 PM  

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