Mama in the City

A blog about raising my family in downtown Vancouver

Forecast For Tomorrow: Potential Happiness

I'm trying to take my own advice and allow myself to be able to feel truly happy in the moment. I want to stop relying on the potential of tomorrows happiness to get me through right now. Too often I fight daily life and find myself daydreaming about how tomorrow will be better, and I'm starting to feel like I might be missing out on some really great moments (*cue Oprah!*).

Like this tiny moment where Ben is blowing his first dandelion puff with such childhood sweetness, determined to get each fluffy seed to fly! Behind the scene I wasn't enjoying this moment nearly as much as he was. Instead I was in my head fretting about things and wondering about tomorrow.

Of course, it's a lot easier to dole out these words of wisdom to someone else than to actually take it. Like all those people who have told you to relax or to 'just be happy'. They have great intention but sometimes it's truly hard to 'just be happy'. It's also impossible to not dream a little bit about tomorrows potential for happiness, when today really sucks for you. I know that my ability to daydream often gets me through hard moments and I've been lucky to be rewarded with a slice of happiness many times.

Rocks as an example of happiness:

Ben likes to collect rocks, it makes him happy to collect a new rock and bring it home with him. He isn't thinking about how big his rock pile could get or how he wishes he had more, he is just happy with bringing that one rock home. He picks up a rock on our walk home and brings it inside the apartment. Now I have an apartment with a scattering of clusters of happy rocks just like this one, and I'm finding myself learning a lesson from my child.


Ashley said...

Oh very true.  Very, very true.

June 11, 2011 at 8:39 PM  
Tarable said...

I find myself doing that quite often.  I am concious of it and try to remind myself to be present in the moment.  Kids are only kids for a little while and I should really try to enjoy it and just relax. 

June 12, 2011 at 9:13 AM  
Anonymous said...

This is a fantastic post and speaks volumes for me right now. I'm going through a hard time and often forget that the moments right now are just as important as those to come.

June 12, 2011 at 1:37 PM  
Sarah M. said...

I understand what you are saying and feel like that all too often as well. (just yesterday actually) Sometimes it is very hard to focus on the simplicity in our lives that (should) bring happiness and joy, like Ben's dandelions.  I think it is totally normal for a parent, we need to have our own lives as well and we crave doing what we want to do that will round out our satisfaction for the day. 

June 13, 2011 at 12:16 PM  
Kristin said...

Hi Andrea!
I have had this post open on my desktop for a couple days now...wanting to tell you about a book that I have and recently picked up again and started going through.  It fits perfectly with this post!  Have a look at it, drop into Chapters and flip through it.  It changes me.  It reminds me of what is important. wrote about it a couple times.....

June 14, 2011 at 12:17 AM  
Kristin said...

Let me try that again.....

June 14, 2011 at 12:20 AM  
alison.burgess said...

Hi Apartment mama! Firstly, I want to say I love reading your blog from the other side of the world (although it is tough to hear you say summer is staring - it is freezing here!). I share your sentiments about being 'in the moment'. Ever since becoming a mummy, for the most part, I have just been enjoying each day as it arises. Now I am planning my return to work however and the 'what-ifs' have started. My little boy is so precious in his daily wonderment though...I hope I can learn to just take stock and enjoy!

July 6, 2011 at 3:30 AM  

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